Category Archives: Business Coaching

Bibliography and Suggested Reading for GKCPA 10.30.2015

Suggested Readings 

Adams, K. M., & Robinson, D. W. (2002). Shame reduction, affect regulation, and

sexual boundary development: Essential building blocks in sexual addiction

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Annon, J. S., (1976). The behavioral treatment of sexual problems: Brief therapy. New

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Applegate, J. S., & Shapiro, J. R. (2005). Neurobiology for clinical social work

practice. Theory and Practice. New York, NY: Norton.

Bancroft, J., Vukadinovic, Z. (2004). Sexual addiction, sexual compulsivity, sexual

impulsivity, or what? Toward a theoretical model. Journal of Sex Research 41(3), 225-


Beattie-Jung, P., Hunt, M. E., & Balakrishnan, R. (2001). Good sex: Feminist

perspectives from the world’s religions.  New Brunswick, N.J.: Rutgers University


Berkowitz, E. (2012). Sex and punishment: Four thousand years of judging desire.

Berkeley, CA: Counterpart.

Bezeau, S. C., Bogod, N. M., & Mateer, C. A. (2004), Sexually intrusive behavior

following brain injury: approaches to assessment and rehabilitation. Brain Injury,

18(3), 299-313.

Black, D. W., Kerhberg, L. L., Flumerfelt, D. L., & Schlosser, S. S. (1997).

Characteristics of 36 subjects reporting compulsive sexual behavior. American Journal

of Psychiatry. 154, 243-249

Black, D., W. (1998). Compulsive sexual behavior: A Review. Journal of Practical

Psychiatry & Behavioral Health, 4 (4), 219-229.

Bogaert, A. F. (2004). Asexuality: Prevalence and associated factors in a national

probability sample. The Journal of Sex Research. 41(3), 279-287.

Boleyn-Fitzgerald, M. (2010). Pictures of the mind: What the new neuroscience tells

us about who we are. Saddle River, NJ: FT Press.

Briken, P., Habermann, N., Berner, W., & Hill, A.  (2007). Diagnosis and treatment of

sexual addiction: A survey among German sex therapists. Sexual addiction and

compulsivity, 14(2), 131-143.

Brower, M. C., & Price, B. H. (2001). Neuropsychiatry of frontal lobe dysfunction in

violent and criminal behavior: a critical review. Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery &

Psychiatry, 71, 720-726.

Byers, L. J., Menzies, K. S., & O’Grady, W. L. (2004). The impact of computer

variables on the viewing and sending of sexually explicit material on the internet:

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Cahn-Weiner, D. A., Grace, J., Ott, B. R., Fernandez, H. H., & Friedman, J. H. (2002).

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Carnes, P. (1989). Contrary to love: Helping the sexual addict. Center City, MN:


Carnes, P. (1997). Sexual anorexia: Overcoming sexual self hatred. Center City, MN:


Carnes, P. (2001). Out of the shadows: Understanding sexual addiction (3rd ed.).

Center City, MN: Hazelden.

Carnes, P., Delmonico, D. L., & Griffin, E. (2001). In the shadow of the net: Breaking

free of compulsive online sexual behavior. Center City, MN: Hazelden.

Carnes, P., Murray, R., E., & Charpentier, L. (2005). Bargains with chaos: Sex addicts

and addiction interaction disorder. Sexual Addition and Compulsivity: The Journal of

Treatment and Prevention. 12 (2-3), 79-120.

Carnes, P. (2005). Facing the shadow: Starting sexual and relationship recovery. (2nd

ed.). Carefree, AZ: Gentle Path Press.

Carr, N. (2010). The Shallows: What the internet is doing to our brains. New York, NY:


Coleman, E. (1986, July). Sexual compulsion vs. sexual addition: The debate continues.

SIECUS Report (pp. 7-11).

Coleman, E. (1987). Sexual compulsivity: Definition, etiology, and treatment

considerations. Journal of Chemical Dependency Treatment, 1(1), 189-204.

Coleman, E. (1990). The obsessive-compulsive model for describing compulsive sexual

behavior. The American Journal of Preventative Psychiatry and Neurology, 2(3), 9-14.

Coleman, E. (1991). Sexual compulsivity: New concepts and treatments. Journal of

Psychology and Human Sexuality, 4(2), 37-52

Coleman, E. (1992). Is your patient suffering from compulsive sexual behavior?

Psychiatrics Annals, 22(6), 320-425.

Coleman, E., Cesnik, J., Moore, A., & Dwyer, S., M. (1992). An exploratory study of the

role of psychotropic medications in the treatment of sex offenders. Journal of Offender

Rehabilitation, 18(3/4). 75-88.

Coleman, E. (1995). Treatment of compulsive sexual behavior. In Rosen, R. C., &

Leiblum, S. R. (Eds.), Case Studies in Sex Therapy (pp. 333-349). New York, NY:

Guilford Press.

Coleman, E., Miner, M., Ohlerking, F., & Raymond, N. (2001) Compulsive sexual

behavior inventory: A preliminary study of reliability and validity. Journal of Sex and

Marital Therapy, 27(4), 325-332.

Coleman, E., Gratzer, T., Nescvacil, L., & Raymond, N. (2000). Nefazadone and the

treatment of non-paraphilic compulsive sexual behavior: A retrospective study. The

Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 61(4), 282-284.

Coleman, E. (2003). Compulsive sexual behavior: What to call it, how to treat it?

SIECUS Report. 31(5). 1-6.

Coleman, E., Raymond, N., & McBean, A., (2003). Assessment and treatment of

compulsive sexual behavior, Minnesota Medicine, 86(7), 42-47.

Coleman, E., Horvath, K., Miner, M., Ross, M., W., Oakes, M., Rosser, B. R. S., &

Men’s INTernet Sex (MINTS-II) Team. Compulsive sexual behavior and risk for

unsafe sex among internet using men who have sex with men. (2009). Archives of

Sexual Behavior, DOI: 10.1007/s10508-009-9507-5.

Coleman, E. (2010). What Sexual Scientists Know about . . . compulsive sexual behavior.

Allentown, PA: Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality. Publications. 2(1), 1- 4.

Cooper, A., Scherer, C., Boies, S. C., & Gordon, B. (1999). Sexuality on the Internet:

From sexual exploration to pathological expression. Professional Psychology:

Research and Practice, 30(2), 154-164.

Cooper, A., Putnam, D., Planchon, L. A., & Boies, S. C. (1999). Online sexual

compulsivity: Getting tangled in the net. Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity: Journal

of Treatment and Prevention, 6 (2), 79-104.

Cooper, A., Boies, S.C., Maheau, M., & Greenfield, D. (1999). Sexuality and the

Internet: The next Sexual Revolution. In F. Muscarella & L. Szuchman (Eds.) The

psychological science of sexuality: A research based approach (pp. 519-545). N.Y.:


Cooper, A., McLoughlin, L., & Campbell, K. (2000). Sexuality in cyberspace: Update for

the 21st Century. Cyberpsychology and Behavior, 3, 521-536.

Coombs, R. H., & Howett, W. A., (2005). The addiction counselor’s desk reference.

Hoboken, NJ: Wiley.

Cozolino, L. (2002). The Neuroscience of psychotherapy: Building and rebuilding the

human brain. New York, NY: Norton.

Craufurd, D., Thompson, J. C., Snowden, J. S. (2001). Behavioral changes in Huntington

Disease, Neuropsychiatry, Neuropsychology, & Behavioral Neurology, 14(4), 219-226.

DeAngelis, T. (2007). Web pornography’s effect on children. Monitor on Psychology.

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Dew, B. J., & Chaney, M. P. (2005). The relationship among sexual compulsivity,

internalized homophobia, and HIV at-risk sexual behavior in gay and bisexual male

users of internet chat rooms. Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity. 12(4), 259-273.

Edwards, W. M. (2009). Living a life i love: healing sexual compulsivity, sexual

addiction and other sexual concerns. Sexual Health Institute: Createspace.

Eisler, R. (1995).  Sacred pleasure: Sex, myth, and the politics of the body. San

Francisco: Harper Collins.

Eisler, R. (1987). The chalice and the blade: Our history, our future. San Francisco:

Harper & Row.

Elliott, M. L., & Biever, L., S. (1996). Head Injury and sexual dysfunction. Brain Injury,

10(10), 703-718.

Etcoff, N. (1999). Survival of The Prettiest: The Science of Beauty. New York, NY:

Anchor Books.

Fergusson, D. M., Horwood, J, Lynskey, M., T. (1996). Childhood sexual abuse and

psychiatric disorder in young adulthood; II: Psychiatric outcomes of childhood sexual

abuse. Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 34:1365-


Ferrara, J. M., & Stacy, M. (2008). Impulse-control disorders in Parkinson’s Disease.

CNS Spectrum. 13(8), 690-698.

Ferree, M. C. (2001). Females and sex addition: Myths and diagnostic implications.

Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity, 8, 287-300.

Fisher, H. (1982). The sex contract: The evolution of human behavior. New York, NY:

Harper Collins Publishers.

Flood, M. (2009). The harms of pornography exposure among children and young

people. Child Abuse Review, (18)6: 384-400.

Frohman, E. M., Frohman, T. C., Moreault, A. M. (2002). Acquired sexual paraphilia in

patients with multiple sclerosis. Achieves of Neurology. 59, 1006-1010

Giugliano, J. (2006). Out of control sexual behavior: A qualitative investigation. Sexual

Addiction & Compulsvity 13(4), 361-375.

Goodman, A. (1993). Diagnosis and treatment of sexual addiction. Journal of Sex &

Marital Therapy, 19(3), 225-251.

Golden, G. H. (2009). In the grip of desire: A therapist at work with sexual secrets.

New York, NY: Routledge.

Green, S., & Flemons, D., (Eds.) (2004). Quickies: The handbook of brief sex therapy.

New York, NY: Norton.

Hall, K. (2007). Chapter 12: Sexual dysfunction and childhood sexual abuse. In

Leiblum, S., R. (Ed.). Principles and Practice of Sex Therapy (4rd ed.). New York, NY:

Guilford Press.

Herman, J., L. (1992). Complex PTSD: A syndrome in survivors of prolonged and

repeated trauma. Journal of Traumatic Stress. 5(3), 1573-6598.

Herper, M., Whelan, D., Langreth, R. (2009, December 22). The shadowy science of sex addiction. Forbes. Retrieved from


Hertlein, K. M., Weeks, G., R. & Sendak, S.,K. (2009). A clinician’s guide to systemic

sex therapy. New York, NY: Routledge.

Hugh, S., Dégano, P. (2005) Hypersexuality in Dementia, Advances in Psychiatric

Treatment. Vol. 11, 424–431.

Kafka, M. (1997). A monoamine hypothesis for the pathophysiology of paraphilic

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Kafka, M. P. (2000). The paraphilia-related disorders: Non-paraphilic hypersexuality

and sexual compulsivity/addiction. In Leiblum, S., R. and Rosen, R. (Eds.), Principles

and Practice of Sex Therapy (3rd ed.). New York, NY: Guilford Press.


Kafka, M. P. (2009). Hypersexual Disorder: A proposed diagnosis for DSM-V. Archives

of Sexual Behavior. DOI; 10.1007/s10508-009-9574-7.

Kafka, M., P., & Hennen, J. (1999). The paraphilia related disorders: An empirical

investigation of non-paraphilic hypersexuality disorders in 209 outpatient males.

Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy. 25. 305-319.

Kafka, M. P. (1997). Hypersexual desire in males: An operational definition and

clinical implications for males with paraphilias and paraphilia-related disorders.

Archives of Sexual Behavior. 26(5), 505-526.

Kahr, B. (2008). Who’s been sleeping in your head: The secret world of sexual

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Kaplan, H. S. (1987). Sexual aversion, sexual phobias and panic disorder.

Levitttown, PA: Brunner Mazel.

Kaschak, E., Tiefer, L. (Eds.). (2001). A new view of women’s sexual problems.

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Kasl, C. D. (1989). Women, sex and addiction: A search for love and power. New

York, NY: Harper Perennial.

Kauffman, J. (Ed.). (2002). Loss of the assumptive world: A theory of traumatic loss.

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Kinsey, A. C., Wardell, P., B., & Martin, C., R. (1948). Sexual behavior in the human

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Kinsey, A., C., Wardell, P. B., Martin, C., R., & Gebhard, P., H. (1953). Sexual behavior

in the human female. Philadelphia, PA: Saunders.

Klein, M. (2006). America’s war against sex: The attack on law, lust and liberty.

Westport, CT: Praeger Publishers.

Klein, M. (2002). Sex addiction: A dangerous clinical concept. Electronic Journal of

Human Sexuality. Volume 5. Retrieved from .htm.

Kleinplatz, P. J. (Ed.). (2001). New directions in sex therapy: Innovations and

alternatives. Philadelphia, PA: Brunner Routledge.

Kleinplatz, P. J., & Moser, C. (Eds.). (2006). Sadomasochism: Powerful pleasures.

Binghamton, NY: Harrington Park Press.

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neuropsychiatric conditions. Seminars in Neuropsychiatry. 5(4), 266-274.

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way we do. New York, NY: Harpers.

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behaviors in parkinson disease. Archives of Neurology, 64(8), 1088-1096.

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Sexual Integrity in porn use.

There is a big debate about is sex and porn addiction. I recently was lucky enough to be a witness to two intelligent, passionate men discuss the common ground in the middle of the debate. The two men I speak of are Dr. David Ley and Dr. Robert Weiss. Today, I read an article that I resonated with in a different context. For me it was a very eloquent definition of sexual integrity. It was written by Dr. Ley. It sparked an interest so I googled Sexual Integrity and guess who’s article came up, Dr. Weiss’s. Was it fate? Or just google feeding me relevant information by relevant individuals? It didn’t matter cause I was off to the races defining sexual integrity for myself. It’s not like this is a new topic for me. I think integrity is a life long endeavor and we are all sexual beings our whole lives.

Dr Weiss wrote this about Sexual Integrity:  “If you are completely open and honest about these things with yourself and with your long-term intimate partner/spouse, and in a boundaried way with new sexual/intimate partners, then you probably have sexual integrity.”

I really like the inclusion of boundaries. Remember, I found this quote after reading an article about porn addiction. Dr. Ley writes about personal responsibility.

Dr David Ley wrote, “requires a man to stand up for himself and his sexual desires, to be willing to negotiate for those needs, to be willing to compromise, but stay true to himself, while asking for the same in return.”

Staying true to one’s self is something I think that is crucial to life satisfaction. I tend to use the phrase authentic truth. However, authenticity and honesty can often involve a lot of fear around rejection. My own work in Kansas City Missouri often involves exploring a unique experience I share with many of my clients. The local culture of our City and geographic area. Kansas City is a unique blend of large city and small town experience. Kansas City on the surface is a progressive city. The bible belt and religious undertow though is always but an unspoken word away. Our unique blend of Kansas City “niceness” often leaves that unspoken word as a space used for judgement.

It’s not uncommon to have a conversation that includes actively putting words to the experience when one’s authentic truth makes someone else uncomfortable. Exploring  the way people talk about this uncomfortable feeling and who’s responsibility it is to resolve it. We explore what it takes to maintain their truth while being vulnerable.

The opposing position is when someone is uncomfortable it’s their own responsibility to deal with that feeling. This is the stuff individuals have to work through with their partner/spouse. These are the topics and obstacles we have to explore in order to have sexual integrity. Does my porn watching affect my relationship? How does my partner feel about me watching porn? How do they feel about me masturbating? How will we as a couple compromise our sexualities including and respecting each other?

Many are being labeled sex addicts or porn addicts solely by their partners feeling uncomfortable with some aspect of their sexual expression. As opposed to discussing, respecting, accepting, and compromising and seeking support and help. Taking personal responsibility for one’s self is part of integrity. Taking responsibility for your sexual expression, self esteem and staying true to self are all parts of sexual integrity.



Sexual Health Matters

I recently finished a year long comprehensive program at the University of Michigan focusing on sexual health as it relates and presents in psychotherapy. I am so amazed at some of the work people are doing regarding pelvic pain, attachment, trauma, intimacy and desire, sexual performance and specifically how it relates to relationships and helping couples come together and understand how their intimacy and sexual health is impacted.

June is Men’s Health Month: The purpose is to heighten the awareness of preventable health problems and encourage early detection and treatment of disease among men and boys. This month gives healthcare providers, public policy makers, the media, and individuals an opportunity to encourage men and boys to seek regular medical advice and early treatment for disease and injury.

We are so used to not talking about anything related to sexual health we have done ourselves, and our children a disservice. One of the analogies I often use with clients is, “if your hand wasn’t working you’d go ask for help, right?” They always respond affirmatively. Why is it that we are so embarrassed to talk to doctors about our sexual health. Compounding the problem is doctors aren’t given adequate training on sexual health. Some of the work I do is basic education. Then together we explore and have conversations about how not being able to talk about sexual health has prevented couples from fully understanding the dynamics of the intimacy issues they often face through different stages of their lives.

Feel free to reach out to me to maybe set up time to discuss where you and your partner are. So during this month of men’s health I want to talk to the ladies. You know your man really doesn’t want to talk to anyone about feelings especially about sex. But what would your relationship look like if together we can get him to open up and be more comfortable sharing what he is thinking and what he is feeling.

Feel free to reach out to me at:


Sex Therapy: Is it for you?

I recently came across an article I thought was really well written.  Here are some of the highlights:

Many couples find it hard to fit sex into their busy schedules. And it is perfectly normal for people to go through periods when they are just not in the mood for love making. However, if you lack desire for sex for emotional or physical reasons, you may want to consider sex therapy.

“There are probably a lot of people out there who could use therapy but do not come because they’re embarrassed. They may go through years of needless pain or dissatisfaction,” says Alexandra Myles, MSW, a sex therapist in Massachusetts.

  • Learn more about sexuality—In spite of the greater openness about sexuality today, many people have little understanding of their own bodies and sexual functioning. Informational and self-help books and educational sex videos, which are widely available, can be very helpful. Becoming better informed will help you decide whether you really need therapy.

Many people come to sex therapy after individual psychotherapy fails to help them with their sexual problems.

“The obvious thing is that you are dealing with the human body so you cannot just talk about how you feel. You have got to work on the physical level as well,” says Myles. Sex therapy generally addresses the emotional issues underlying sexual problems and employs behavioral techniques to deal with the physical symptoms.

One popular technique used in treating many sexual problems is called sensate focus, in which couples caress or massage each other without sexual contact. The goal is to help both partners learn to give and receive pleasure and feel safe together. As the partners become more comfortable, they can progress to genital stimulation.

As a result of performing this exercise, many couples discover new ways to experience pleasure other than sexual intercourse. “Some of my patients find that they become better lovers,” says Dennis Sugrue, PhD, a sex therapist in Michigan.

Other exercises treat specific problems such as women’s inability to have orgasms and men’s erectile problems. Performing these exercises often evokes strong feelings that are then explored through psychotherapy. People who have experienced sexual trauma or are confused about their sexual identity may need to spend more time working through their feelings. For couples, who make up the majority of clients, the focus is on improving communication and developing greater intimacy.

In looking for a sex therapist, it is particularly important to find someone who you trust and respect. Do not be afraid to ask questions about the therapist’s background, philosophical orientation, and experience with your problem.

“A sex therapist can be very influential,” says Gina Ogden, a certified sex therapist in Massachusetts, “because there are fewer people who you can talk with about your sexual issues.” She warns against therapists who have rigid ideas of what human sexual response should be. Myles agrees, “Sex is such a subjective experience. You cannot impose your own beliefs on a patient.”

Most sex therapists today, according to Dennis Sugrue, “look at the whole person and try to help men and women redefine what it means to make love.” The effects of aging or physical problems “do not mean that a couple cannot experience the pleasure and joy of being physically intimate with each other.”

To read the entire article you can find it at:

Kansas City LGBT Guild Therapist doing great work

English: Gender symbols, sexual orientation: h...
English: Gender symbols, sexual orientation: heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality. Česky: (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

LGBT individuals are less likely to seek healthcare, feel alienated by the healthcare community, and in some cases are not given the same level of care as the rest of the community.

Sexual heath and how it is shaped and or ignored by the healthcare system has created a disparity in the quality and accessibility of healthcare available to minorities, and sexual minorities in particular, is a growing concern.  In March of 2011 The Institute of Medicine reported that Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender people have unique health needs, but that little is known about what those needs are.  The Lancet Medical Journal followed with an April 2011 article stating that a large number of healthcare practitioners are not well informed about how to care for LGBT health concerns, particularly the needs of transgender individuals.  Many of those that are still have psychological barriers to asking probing questions about sex due to a concern of not knowing what to do with that information once they have it.  An article in The Journal of Counseling Psychology pointed out that even well-meaning providers may exhibit certain levels of heterosexist micro-aggressions, or subtle attitudes that convey a negative connotation about an individual’s LGBT identity.

In response to this growing need, a number of therapists in the Kansas City community have started an organization dedicated to serving the health needs of LGBT individuals and their families.  The LGBT-Affirmative Therapists Guild of the Greater Kansas City area is a grassroots organization of licensed mental and medical health professionals, as well as students-in-training.  They share a collaborative commitment to make affirming culturally competent healthcare available for all sexual minorities based on the premise that LGBT and heterosexual identities are equally valid. Their website ( provides consumers and practitioners with referrals and resources for LGBT health and advocacy concerns.

Members of the Guild meet at various times throughout the year for consultation and education regarding the healthcare concerns of sexual and gender minorities.  They are available to speak to businesses or organizations about LGBT related concerns.  They are also happy to promote any public activities, groups, or events that enhance an understanding of LGBT people and their concerns.  Membership in the Guild is free of charge and open to those from various disciplines and of any sexual orientation.